You promised me the night,
assuring it was only you and i.
Awestruck you leave me,
probably lost in her dreams.
I knew it wasn't meant to be forever,
but every bit of it is buried deep within.
I still wish to sit by your side,
point out at those silly stars.
And glance back with a smile,
saying..
There's me still after you...
continued...
There were no signs of him or his texts & i assumed the fact that he fell asleep or was probably lost in her dreams. The fact of him disappearing out of the blue did annoy me for sometime, but the fact that i could hint him to what i exactly feel for him made me feel more optimist about the fact that i could just let my feelings flow out more flexibly. I did complete a good chunk of assignments and so i happily surrendered myself to my beloved bed, who's been waiting for quite long.
Hours later...
I woke up with a horrible back pain, to my surprise, i was sleeping at the dinning table with my head buried deep in my assignments, all crumpled and on the verge of devastation. I was still happy and excited about the nocturnal conversation i had with him, i wanted to feel more of that excitement by rereading the texts. Within fraction of seconds, i opened my messenger, just to get more confused and surprised, i couldn't find that conversation anywhere, i checked the whole list thoroughly for around n no. of times, i simply couldn't find his name in the list. Many thoughts occupied my mind within seconds, i was trying to relate the series of events which happened last night, but to my greatest fears, it seemed more of a dream, his text never showed up at the first place, and when i was at my extreme point of giving up, i actually felt asleep over my assignments & dreamed about the whole conversation instead of having it for real. I did feel upset about the whole fact for being a dream, but somewhere i still had this urge of confessing my feelings to him. I text him, to where was he now a days and how he's doing, hours later he texts me back saying things were going excellent on his side, we chat for quite some time, to where he makes a mention that we should meet up for lunch, it's been a long time that we haven't met in flesh and blood. I was anyways pretty excited by the fact for going for a lunch with him, all though the whole idea was of meeting him up and maybe with a group of 5-7 friends too would be joining us too, but then i was all cool with the fact, that we would be finally meeting after a pretty long time.
Me :Well, i am super excited to meet you and the gang though, it's been a long time though.
Him :Oh well, very much indeed, we will have lots of food and gossips to keep us going though.
Me :I am not sure about the gossips part though, but i can assure about the fact that my plate would be perfect clean and you won't find a morsel of food on it.
Him :Do you just plan to keep quite and complete all the food served out there ?
Me :hahhahahah, absolutely not !
Numb and silence,
will be over me.
Wonder and confusion,
over your grin.
Unexplained silence,
heart burdened stories.
Is in store,
for you and me.
Him :Mind making things any simpler ?
Me : I will narrate a story to you, mind lending a ear or two ?
Him :Yes, for sure, go ahead !
Me :
She said,
How about you prove them all ?
I exclaimed back,
there's no such need !
She reinforced on her statement,
"Let them know, who you are !",
I declined back with a mild punch,
my physical strength went in vain.
Her convincing mode won.
She dragged me along,
made me accompany the hopeless love !
I cursed and cribbed throughout,
and there it commenced.
Later though,
but finally then.
There they enter,
the famous organisers.
And so did you.
I grab her hand tight,
and interrogate with highest curiosity.
Know of him ?
exclaims back in disgust.
Not of him,
but others i do.
Curiosity stabbing me,
i wonder who could you be !
Aesthetically moving and talking,
and there another soul.
Screams your name fro back,
and there me,
wishing the person the best life ahead.
My eyes kept moving,
with every fine step of yours.
Trying tremendously hard,
to make you catch a glimpse of me.
With a stone on my heart,
keeping my academics after "Le fête"
Naming myself with the other enthusiasts,
hoping to catch a glimpse of you.
Laughed backed she !
your love for food did reflected well.
Ans so it did in your choice of him,
"Half fried noodles", i blushed.
She patted back,
it won't be far.
You may grab his heart,
for your daily love.
Blushing loud, i depart,
with infinite thoughts of you.
"Creative department",
as they called of it.
But for me,
a golden chance.
*To watch your crush speaking lectures*
Every word of yours,
synced with every nod of ours.
Every statement of yours,
was our well planned execution.
Every unnoticed stares of yours,
became my ultimate thirst.
Every moment seeing you passing by me,
gave me a painful hopeless happiness.
And every second day passing,
made my friends feel,
that i have lost myself,
to the noodles unaware about me.
But for me,
it wasn't a tale of days.
But every little honest second,
the fact it's not me but her.
They said, not him, but else !
i denied with hope again.
It's gotta be him or none.
"Le fête" was an excuse,
just to see more of you.
It was a mere truth,
that "Le fête" mattered to my soul.
My only aim back then,
was not to shine bright in the group,
but just to be a mere illusion in your eye.
Things turned impossible,
attempts turned failure.
Creativity was in vain,
I could do nothing,
but show the worse of me.
They screamed again,
it's not him, but else,
Stop killing that helpless brain,
and get your soul and heart in place.
There words were total vain,
everything disappeared.
As your sight appeared,
it paralysed a little of me,
when i saw you with her.
Entangled sights,
Entangled lives,
Entangled love,
Entangled hands,
Entangled hearts,
Entangled you and her,
Entangled who else ?
Entangled earphones !
That little entanglement,
Reason behind your love involvement !
Culprits and enemies,
shared the same positions.
Life seemed screwed up,
more than the entangled gear !
It was more of,
nokia and samsung in love.
Life seemed creepy,
friends seemed to pretty.
I hopelessly depressed,
smiling as if it's a nightmare.
Noodles were my enemies,
earphones forever replaced with headphones.
Love stories replaced with histories,
life growing to be more lifeless.
Crying harder to unscrew academics,
loosing self in ocean of griefs.
Accepting it wasn't meant to be,
accepting it couldn't have been,
accepting it wasn't me,
accepting it can't be us.
I want go back there,
that place with million memories.
Still killing every of me,
planting a mysterious smile on me...
***THE END***
-Oindrila Pal, BeingLeha
